21 September (midnight)

The moon has come up and been risen for roughly 40 minutes. I have tea Amanda left me steeping to my right. My eyes are heavy and drooping like tired breasts. But I don't want to fall asleep. As though awake I have company, asleep I can only dream of it, and my actual guests leave in the morning. The only thing pressing my mind is desire - my heart, desire.

It is, oft times, easiest to laugh.

The coyotes have started howling, yelping, crying - banshees coming with the heavier winds, they roll in like the grim reaper. And vanish. But not gone, they'll wait, they'll gather, they'll weep in my driveway and jerk me from dreams and I'll roll and listen and howl my own heart. They must be cold, lonely, and I, in my cold room, grow lonely.